Attention citizens!

The Miracle Shots (TM) saved 20 million billion zillion people. Trust our models.

Attention citizens! Your Dept. Of Pandemia is back, with good news.

We know some of you are wondering if the Miracle Shots (TM) work, what with all the infections and deaths in Miracle Shot (TM) recipients and the fact that the countries that have the fewest Miracle Shots (TM) also have the fewest deaths from The Thing (TM, Wuhan, 2018).

Well now we have …