Yes, the global elites are even stupider and more tone-deaf than you imagined

As part of their never-ending effort to beclown themselves, Bill Gates, Hillary Clinton, and Jared Kushner stop by a $150 million (yes) party in one of the world's poorest countries

Every part of this article will read like a parody.

Only it’s real.

Over the weekend, the richest man in India, Mukesh Ambani, spent about $150 million to marry off his youngest and fattest son, Anant, before various and assorted members of the global elite. It was the wedding of the year!

Actually not, it was a pre-wedding. The wedding itself is not happening until July 12 in Mumbai, because celestial blessings or something, but July 12 is monsoon season, not global elite season.

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(Come for the news, stay for the snark. Or maybe the other way around? 20 cents a day either way.)

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So, okay, a pre-wedding.

Featuring Rihanna, because even though he’s worth $116 billion, Mukesh apparently couldn’t afford Beyonce - who performed at his daughter’s wedding in 2018 - this time.

Alas, Rihanna apparently slept her way through her 40-minute, $6 million show. You get what you pay for, Mukesh! (Last year, Beyonce made a cool $24 million to perform in Dubai, where homosexuality is illegal, putting aside her loud n’ proud support of gay rights until the wire transfer hit.)

But Unreported Truths is not here to mock the richest man in India, his elephantine offspring, or a pre-wedding that cost enough to pay a year’s wages for 60,000 Indians. Hey, if Mukesh’s wants to blow 0.13 percent of his net worth on a three-day party, that’s his business.

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(Beauty and the beast!

ALT: You always earn it.

ALT ALT: Like grandma said, it’s as easy to marry rich as poor.)

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No, Unreported Truths is here to mock the Americans and other assorted Westerners who showed up to kiss Mukesh’s ring. Or maybe to see how far $150 million would go in a country where something like 300 million people still survive on less than $3 a day. (Though, to its credit, India has made significant strides in eliminating extreme poverty in the last decade.)

Who showed up?

Oh, everyone you’d expect…

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(He’s just a kindly old billionaire trying to dress like a native, really…)

(Wait, how’d that get in there?)

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(Draining the swamp begins at home…)

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(There are no words. Except loser.)

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And don’t forget Hillary Clinton! (CORRECTION: Hillary went to the 2018 wedding of Mukesh’s daughter Isha, the one where Beyonce played.)

As part of the festivities, guests spent a pleasant afternoon at the Reliance Animal Rescue Center, where 2,000 animals are cared for in a beautiful 650-acre campus -

- sorry, that’s Dharavi, a slum in Mumbai where a million people live in under 600 acres. My bad! Partygoers were not taken to Dharavi, it might have been a drag.

Anyway, try to get your head around flying your private jet to India (and remember, just about all these folks are generals in the climate change apocalypse army) so you could take another private jet to the party and bend the knee to a not-at-all-corrupt centi-billionaire!

It is impossible to be too cynical.