Is it monkeypox, or crystalpox?

Once again, honesty is going to prove tough for the public health authorities

Are you a gay man?

Specifically, are you a gay man who likes sex with lots of other gay men? Maybe in a bathhouse? Maybe names optional? Maybe with a meth bump on the side?

No? Are you sure?

It’s cool if you are, no judgments. They’re called glory holes for a reason, people!

Still no?

Okay. Don’t worry about the monkeypox thing then.

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You can almost feel the …